Blue Like Tidy-Bowl Cleaner, Kool-Aid, and Heaven:
Thoughts on Home, Family, and God from the middle of Suburbia!
Though I grew up in church, the Bible and I weren’t properly introduced until I was already a young mom with three kids. I had aspirations of becoming a writer, so I set my alarm clock early to start writing before my kids woke up. This worked, well, for about a week until I started feeling guilty. That was because I often complained about not having time to read my Bible and pray, yet I had made the time to write.
So the next day when my alarm went off, I decided to read my Bible first. Five minutes should be enough time, I figured.
Amazingly, though my motivation was to ease my conscience, God began to speak. Five minutes turned into fifteen, and soon my little date with the Good Book became a romance with my Maker.
I got myself a journal, and I started jotting down all the Scripture verses that really stood out to me. Sometimes I added my thoughts. Other times written prayers.
I added some devotional books to my morning time, and wow … I found some good stuff. Before I knew it, my morning writing time had been replaced. I grew to need my time with God. Just me and Him and a cup of java. God spoke. I listened. And my heart was transformed.
Twelve years later, I now long for my morning solitude. I get downright crabby when, for some reason or another, I miss out on those moments with my God. And you know what? That’s okay. It’s okay to be jealous of my time with God. It’s okay to be needy. (I learned that from my one of my Bible readings somewhere along the line.)
How come we, as people, hesitate to take time for what we need most of all? Sometimes when I’m at church, I wonder if I’m the only one who is so needy, and so in love at the same time? I have to admit I’m discouraged when I see people in Sunday school class looking in the front of their Bibles to figure out where Hebrews can be found. I try to share my passion for my morning moments, only to receive comments like ‘I’m not a morning person’ or ‘Well, your kids are bigger now.’ Both are true, sort of. But they have little to do with what the Word of God now means to me.
One Scripture verse that has made it into my journal more than once, and is highlighted in bright yellow, is Acts 4:13: “When they saw the courage of Peter and John and realized that they were unschooled, ordinary men, they were astonished and they took note that these men had been with Jesus.”
To sum it up, that’s what my morning quiet time means to me. I’ve been with Jesus, and I’d like to think it gives me more courage and wisdom than if I’d not spent time in His Word. But more than what I get out of it, it’s just the fact I’ve BEEN WITH JESUS. Like a teen girl who just had a first date with the most handsome and popular guy at school, I get that giddy, overwhelmed, undeserved feeling every time OUR time comes to an end. And that’s something I hope I never outgrow.
Labels: bible, courage, devotional books, god, scripture, transformation, wisdome, writing
Blue Like Tidy-Bowl Cleaner, Kool-Aid, and Heaven:
Thoughts on Home, Family, and God from the middle of Suburbia!In the top middle drawer of my dresser, my bras can be categorized in two styles. Fancy and comfortable. I have about the same number of each, though the latter set gets used twice as much. I often use the “fancy” on the days I want to feel pretty. Or on days when I know my husband will be coming home for lunch, and I can flash him just for fun. (He loves it when I do that, and it usually guarantees a love note via email.) Fancy is worth it on days like that.
But although I’ve tried many kinds of fancy, I’ve discovered that usually within an hour I feel tense and tight and I have to change. Like right now. I’m squirming in my computer chair as if I was bound by a thick rope around my chest. Excuse me while I change.
Ahhh … much better.
Anyway, I was thinking today as I showered how similar my bra selection compares to the books on my bookshelf. Sometimes I hear about an “enlightening” book, and I just have to buy it. I usually read a few pages, and it’s sort of fancy. It may talk about things like spiritual disciplines, or foundational truths, or it may use big words that I sort of understand but don’t completely track with. I usually get a few chapters in before another book takes its place on my nightstand. I tell myself I’ll get back to the fancy book one day, and I have every intention to. After all, these are smart Christian people who have a heart for God. People I should pay attention to.
In the end, I find myself falling back to what’s comfortable. Like my favorite bras, my favorite books get a lot of use. I have a copy of My Utmost for His Highest by
Oswald Chambers. And more than one copy of Experiencing God by
Henry Blackaby. I find myself loving these books because they help me to connect with God and feel His heart.
There are a ton of other great books, too, by authors like
Robert Benson,
John Fischer, and
Brenda Waggoner that are sort of fancy, but in a comfortable way. These, to me, are the best of both worlds. They have forever found a place upon my bookshelf, and I finding myself returning to them again and again.
When it comes to fancy bras, I buy them to make myself feel better and to impress my husband. And, as I was thinking about this in the shower, I wondered if I do the same with my reading choices. Am I trying to make myself look good or impress others when they talk about some books? Or do I think I’ll be able to flash God with a ‘look at this’ and brighten His day?
Just like everybody has different dental records, every mind and heart is unique, too. Maybe what I think is comfortable is fancy to another person. Or what I think is fancy may be someone else’s bite, and that’s okay.
Because in the long run it’s not about looking good, it’s about finding the right support. (Pun totally intended.) My devotional books support me and help me connect with God. They give me the lift I need to look into my Maker’s gaze.
Sure, I’ll keep those other books around. They’ll be dusted, stacked and restacked. Maybe someday my taste will change, and they’ll become my new comfort. But for now I’m going with what works, what fits me, and what provides the support I need.
Labels: books, devotional books, god, jesus
