Generation NeXt Parenting

Children are a welcome addition to families, but their presence unquestionably affects every aspect of married life. In our child-centered society, it is important to focus on is God and each other…even with little ones wrapped around our knees. Of course, Cory was already nine months old when John and I got married—we had a ready-made family. Having two more kids in the next three years added to the fun.

Needless to say, we all had some adjusting to do in our first years of marriage. For example, Cory liked to sleep with mom and didn’t want another guy taking his place. On the nights when he found his way into our bed, he’d turn sideways and kick John with all his might. And who said babies are innocent?

But this wasn’t even our biggest struggle. Rather, it was my belief that I knew best when it came to raising kids. After all, I was a stay-at-home mom and around the kids all day. How dare John come home from work and have different ideas about how things should run? Let’s just say it caused more than one moment of conflict.

“No matter how many children God gives you, it’s important to operate jointly in parenting,” say Dennis and Barbara Rainey, authors of Staying Close. “Again and again, I see families where the woman is expected to raise the kids. Contrary to male expectations, women are not made physically, emotionally, or spiritually to rear children by themselves.”

Over time, and after a lot of frustration, I figured out three things: 1) John sometimes knew what he was talking about, 2) I could learn from his ideas, and 3) the kids benefited from enjoying a close relationship with their dad.

John was firm but loving. And he was fun. By raising our kids together, instead of trying to balance marriage and solo parenting, my life got easier in many ways.

Hmmmm… maybe that’s why God designed children to be raised by both a mother and father?

Gender Matters?

If you have kids, you’ve probably noticed that there seem to be innate differences between girls and boys.

Boys (at least mine and my nephews) are simply more physical. Let’s slug each other. Tackle each other. Knock the wind out of each other. All in love of course.

Girls are into frills, dolls, quiet play. At least most of the time.

But how do those differences play into education? There’s a really interesting sight that talks about some of those basic differences. At http://www2.blogger.com/www.WhyGenderMatters.com Dr. Lenoard Sax, a family physician and Ph.D. psychologist, elaborates on why boys and girls behave differently in school.

Some of the highlights:

Boys don’t hear sounds (or register them) at the same decibels that girls do.

Boys do math better standing up…hmmm, maybe that explains why they get so restless if required to sit in a chair for hours on end. Come to think of it, my six year old daughter has some of the same ants in her pants syndrome at times.

Boys respond better if the temperature is six degrees cooler than girls. So when I tell my son to put on a jacket and he strips it off the moment it steps out the door it may actually be because he’s warm and not disobedient. Who can play when they’re roasting?

Anyway, I think these ideas are interesting. I’m going to check out his book, Why Gender Matters, and see what other insights I can glean into helping my son and my daughter become everything God placed them here to be – in their own unique ways.

So what gender differences have you noticed in the children around you?