Guest Blogger...Cara Putnam
So Saturday I was shopping online -- otherwise known as procrastinating when I should have been revising.
I'm looking for one or two specific items, but found myself on piperlime.com. I guess it's a shoe store loosely affiliated with Gap. Let me tell you, the sale prices were great. I almost pulled the trigger and bought a couple pairs of shoes, but I hesitated. The sales shoes did not allow returns. I can understand in one way: they don't want someone like me to buy six pairs of shoes only to return four later. Yet, with my long, narrow feet, I've learned that I need to try things on before I find something that fits right, so they lost a sale...
And there were some really cute ballet flats on clearance! I almost felt like Ashley Stockingdale or the star of some other chick lit as I was looking at $300 shoes marked down to $50. Who doesn't love that!
Lafayette is a great town, but the shopping is abysmal for someone my size. There is one store in town other than GAP where I can buy clothes that fit but don't make me look like I'm trying to pretend I'm 16 again. Don't get me wrong, I loved being 16...but I'm not anymore. And even if I were, I'm really not into belly showing styles.
There are many things I will buy online: Books, skirts, simple shirts, dresses. And I love going on a site like GAP.com and raiding the sale page. Books are pretty easy. You see the cover, read a review and purchase. But clothes, only if I can return them -- and preferably if I can return them in a store where I don't have to pay shipping. Call me cheap, but I can't stand the thought of paying for shipping twice. Ugh!
So what do you shop for online? What store has surprised you with its level of service and ease of returns? What shopping secrets do you have to share with a bargain hunter like me...cause you know I'll need to procrastinate again soon!
Cara C. Putman
Canteen Dreams -- October 2007; Sandhill Dreams -- May 2008 and Captive
Dreams -- September 2008 (Heartsong Presents)
Deadly Exposure -- June 2008 (LI Suspense)
The Law, Life & Books: http://carasmusings.blogspot.com
Original Writer for Jake Tremaine at Scenes & Beans: http://kannerlake.blogspot.comLabels: books, clothing, gap, on-line shopping, shoes, shopping
Prayer Changes Things
1Timothy 2:1, 3 (The Message) The first thing I want you to do is pray. Pray every way you know how, for everyone you know…This is the way our savior God wants us to live.
More than anything, parenting takes courage. There is no going with the flow, no just trying to slide by, when it comes to raising kids.
As we enter the uphill battle of child rearing, we must trust the success of our parenting to God. Prayer is key. Sometimes situations are hard to see, and we feel like we are blindly tramping around. In raising kids in this day and age, we need to take all our needs before God and leave the results to Him. In prayer we plead our case before God, we get God’s perspective, and gain confidence and courage.
God doesn’t always answer our prayers in the way we hoped or expected, but we can trust that He will answer our prayer in the best way, not just sometimes, but every time.
As Gen X parents, we know that these are trying times to be raising children, but we must realize that we are parents now, not by chance, but by design. God has called us to parent specifically during this time in history.
Here are some scriptures for your parenting journey:
1. Prayers of need (Psalm 55:22, Jeremiah 17:7-8)
2. Prayers of thanksgiving (Psalm 40:5, Romans 11:33)
3. Prayers for seeking families (Matthew 11:25, Psalm 116:6-7)
4. Prayers for generations (Psalm 105:708, Psalm 100:5)
©Tricia Goyer
Labels: generation x, god, parenting, prayer
Real Life Q & A
© Tricia GoyerAdvice is like snow;
the softer it falls,
the longer it dwells upon,
and deeper it sinks into the mind.
–Samuel Taylor Coleridge
I don’t know about you, but I like reading advice columns. I especially like the ones in the morning paper that deal with everything from “handling a cranky mother-in-law” to “telling someone they have stinky feet.” Sometimes I don’t agree with the advice given, but most of the time I do.
Do you ever wish you had a direct line to an advice columnist? I have a problem . . . can you help . . .
My baby won’t sleep in her own bed.
My boyfriend gets jealous of my friends.
My parents want to rule my life.
Then, when you opened the next morning’s paper, the perfect answer would be there?
Thankfully, God has placed people all around us who can offer good advice. Sometimes the advice is given without us asking. (Okay, many times!) In other instances, we seek people out.
The key is knowing who to listen to . . . and when. Below are tips to help you do just that!
A, B, C’s of Getting Good Advice1. A-sk away: It’s okay to ask for advice. No one knows it all!
2. B-e proctive: Remember, what you do (or don’t do) is your responsibility. It’s up to you to take the initiative and to make good choices. And remember, not making a decision is actually a choice too.
3. C-onsider your options: God brings people into our lives to help. Look around and consider: Who has God brought into my life to help me find the answer to this problem?
4. D-ecide who could offer the best help: Seek out different people for your various life issues. There are educational counselors, financial counselors, family counselors, employment counselors, legal counselors, and others, who are experts at what they do. Ask around and you can usually find help for free.
5. E-liminate extremes. Here are two: 1) being too independent, or 2) expecting someone else to be your complete authority. The only Person we should follow 100% of the time is God.
6. F-ollow God’s Word. The Bible provides great counsel. Check out the book of Proverbs. It’s a collection of good advice. Also skim through the last quarter of the Bible to find more good ideas.
7. G-ive special attention to those in authority over you. This includes parents (if you still live at home), older adults, employers, and church or group leaders.
8. H-ope for success. One of the worst things we can do is let things slide instead of dealing with them. Put your hope in the fact that things can get better. Having this mindset will make all the difference in finding a successful solution.
9. I-nvite the input of several counselors for bigger decisions. Proverbs 15:22 says, “Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed.”
10. J-udge whether your issue is a matter of right or wrong. Is it a moral decision or a personal preference? Always strive for “right.”
11. K-eep yourself from asking advice from only those who agree with you. Listen and weigh other opinions, especially ideas from others who have faced some of the same life experiences.
12. L-isten to your heart. Novelist Erica Jong says, “Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer but wish we didn't.” Deep down do you already know the answer? Go with that.
13. M-ake sure you seek help from people who adequately know you and your situation. In most cases, it’s better to give more weight to the person who’s supported you for ten years, in comparison to someone you met last weekend.
14. N-ever rush into a decision you’re not comfortable with. Give yourself time to sift through all the advice and weigh your options.
15. O-pen your heart to God. God is the best counselor of all. He speaks through Scripture and through His Spirit’s inner voice. When it comes to seeking advice, go to God in prayer first.
16. P-ay attention. Does the person offering advice follow it herself? Does it work?
17. Q-uestion how your decision will effect your future. Ask youself, “Five years from now, how will I view this decision? What decision will I be most happy with at that time?”
18. R-equire mature advisors. Your kid brother or a crazy friend from high school might not be the best choices to turn to for help!
19. S-eek advice from someone you’d like to imitate. Baby birds learn to fly by imitating their mothers. We can choose whom to imitate—and if choose the right people, we will soar!
20. T-rust the advice of those who strive to follow God. Christians won’t always have all the right answers, but they often seek God who does.
21. U-se common sense. Don’t ask for advice when your common sense provides an adequate answer.
22. V-isualize the outcome. What are the pros of someone’s answer? What are the cons?
23. W-eigh your motives. What’s the deeper issue?
24. X-pect that not everyone who gives you advice will agree. Different people have different opinions. It’s up to you to choose the best one.
25. Y-ield to “good enough.” You may not find the perfect solution right away, but work on a solution that’s “good enough” while you continue to search.
26. Z-zzzzz Zzzzz. Sleep on it. Your problems always seem bigger and more overwhelming when you’re tired. A good night’s sleep does a world of wonders!
Labels: parenting, parenting advice
Guest Blogger...Cara Putnam
As the last Harry Potter book has just released, I wanted to introduce you to one of my favorite new fantasy authors.
The Restorer is
Sharon Hinck's first foray into straight fantasy and it is a wonderful read.
First off, you need to know that I am NOT a fantasy reader. I couldn't read JRR Tolkein's Lord of the Rings or Hobbit until after I saw The Fellowship of the Ring. I simply couldn't picture the worlds he created. Finally, my love for my husband and my sincere enjoyment of the movie pushed me to pick up those books. I enjoyed them, but I doubt I will read them again until my kids are old enough to enjoy them.
However, The Restorer is a book I know I will return to again. Susan is a mom with a life that seems perfect, but it's missing something. She longs to do and be more for God, yet doesn't know how. Her husband creates an escape for her in the attic, a place to hide from the activity of her kids and try to reconnect with God. The first time she uses it, she is sucked through a portal and into a new world.
Let me stop right there. I really expected at that point to throw the book aside. I knew it was fantasy, but I had no idea how that would play out. All I knew before picking it up was that a soccer mom takes on a Deborah-esque role. However, I could not put this book down, even as I was sucked with Susan into a world I'd never heard of or seen.
Susan experiences all the bewildering emotions of landing in a new place, unsure of what just happened and how she will get home. The first two people she meets in this world scare her to death; she just watched one kill a man, the other seems dangerous in unspoken ways. Yet she is forced to depend on them as she faces the uncertainties and unknowns of this new life.
She follows Tristan to his community where he takes her under his wing and begins to teach her the skills of a guardian. In some ways the community seems something out of the Middle Ages, but it's not. The author paints the scene with vivid details that had me smelling the air, seeing the sky, tasting the strange food. She also painted the characters with strokes that left me feeling like I knew them. It was easy to pretend I was Susan traveling through the story. Feeling the abuse her body took. The overwhelming mental challenges. The spiritual exertion.
The story is rich with villains, too. These villains are unlike any I've seen before. And their weapon of choice? Poisoning unsuspecting minds with lies that will debilitate. The imagery of spiritual warfare was rich yet shadowed. The book never became preachy, yet I could easily connect with the idea that the truth is all that will protect us from the lies of our Enemy.
I LOVED this book, and cannot wait to read book two when it releases this fall. And this from someone who runs the other direction as soon as someone mentions fantasy.
Cara C. Putman
Canteen Dreams -- October 2007; Sandhill Dreams -- May 2008 and Captive
Dreams -- September 2008 (Heartsong Presents)
Deadly Exposure -- June 2008 (LI Suspense)
The Law, Life & Books: http://carasmusings.blogspot.com
Original Writer for Jake Tremaine at Scenes & Beans:
http://kannerlake.blogspot.comLabels: children, fantasy authors, harry potter, reading, science fiction, sharon hinck, tolkein
Interview with Laura Christianson
Meet Laura Christianson. She is an author and freelance journalist specializing in adoption-related issues. Her "Exploring Adoption" blog received Forbes magazine's "Best of the Web" rating. Laura has written numerous general-interest features and essays for national and regional publications. She speaks regularly at writers conferences and other events. Laura lives in Seattle with her husband and two children, who both joined their family through adoption. You can learn more about Laura and her books at her
website.
1. Can you tell us a little about your self and how you became interested in adoption?
After my husband and I had been married five years, we decided it was time to start having children. Then we discovered we had infertility challenges. During the time we were trying to decide how to deal with our infertility, several of our friends adopted. We closely observed them, pummeled them with questions, and decided that adopting would be the best family-building option for us. Rather than pursuing infertility treatment, we quickly moved towards adoption.
We adopted our two sons when they were newborns (they are now 14 and 11 years old), and we have completely open adoptions with their respective birth families, which is quite a fun adventure!
2. There seems to be an increase in the amount of adoptions happening in this country. What do you attribute this trend to?
With the recent tightening of adoption laws in other countries, the amount of parents adopting internationally actually decreased slightly, from 22,728 in Fiscal Year 2005 to 20,679 in FY 2006. But interest in and awareness of adoption is on the rise. I attribute some of that to the fascination with celebrities such as Angelina Jolie and Madonna, who have recently adopted. Because they are such high-profile people, their adoption stories put adoption in the news—and on people’s minds.
Plus, with an entire generation of internationally-adopted children now grown, families with multiple ethnicities are becoming the norm. People are used to seeing white parents with Chinese children. More people are acquainted with adoptive families. Once you meet an adoptive family and realize they really aren’t all that weird, your own interest in adoption increases and you begin to ponder the possibility of adding to your family through adoption.
3. How can couples who want to adopt make it happen? Where do they start?
Most people who truly have a heart to adopt can make it happen, but it takes a great deal of patience and perseverance. For starters, I recommend learning as much as you can about adoption, so that when the unforeseen happens (and it will happen), you’ll be slightly more prepared. Read as many adoption books as possible, subscribe to magazines such as Adoptive Families and Adoption TODAY, peruse adoption blogs, subscribe to e-mail discussion groups specific to the type(s) of adoption you are considering, request information packets from all the
adoption agencies and facilitators in your region, join support groups for adoptive families, and pummel other adoptive parents with questions! Most of us adoptive parents truly enjoy sharing our experiences – we’ve been where you are and know what you’re feeling. Educating yourself about adoption will give you confidence and will equip you with the practical tools you need to build your family through adoption.
4. Can you tell me a little about your new books and what prompted you to write them?
Eleven years ago, after we adopted our second child, I was a member of an online Christian support group for infertile women and adoptive moms. We often discussed the crazy comments people—particularly, our relatives—made about adoption. I decided to write a short booklet to help educate adoptive grandparents about adoption, so they could better support their adult children who were adopting. As I began researching, I realized I had enough material for a full-length book.
Because you’re an author yourself, Tricia, you know that the process of “pitching” a book project to agents and editors is not for the faint-hearted. I attended Christian writers’ conferences for three years, pitching my project right and left and incorporating suggestions from various editors/agents into my book proposal. Last year, Harvest House Publishers offered me a contract for The Adoption Decision (which releases in early August). As soon as I finished writing that manuscript, I completed another manuscript I had been working on, The Adoption
Network (which was just released by WinePress Publishing).
I call The Adoption Decision a “how-to for the heart,” because it acquaints readers with the emotional and spiritual aspects of adoption and adoptive parenting. It’s packed with fascinating stories from people whose lives are directly impacted by adoption – there’s no dry, boring, clinical stuff in this book! I think it’s an entertaining read and it helps people clarify what they want their own adoption to “look like.”
The Adoption Network is a companion volume to The Adoption Decision. It’s a workbook for people who want build a face-to-face community of support for adoptive and foster families, birth/first parents, or adopted people. It is packed with worksheets and practical tips about how to start an adoption ministry in your church or community.
5. In your opinion, what is the most important piece of advice for someone in the process of adopting?
Hang in there! The adoption process truly stretches you—sometimes past the limits of what you imagine you can bear. But it also grows you in ways you never would have expected or experienced otherwise. While you may wonder whether you’ll ever meet that child you’ve begun to love, it will happen. As you’re waiting, be proactive about creating a support network for both you and your future child. Make an appointment with a pediatrician who specializes in adoption medicine, find out what social services are available in your community for adopted children, and attend events where you can meet other adoptive families. A support network is an invaluable
resource for adoptive families.
6. Do you consider adoption support your job or your ministry?
Both. About 10 years ago, I started an adoption support ministry at my church in Seattle; I care deeply about encouraging and informing those who are considering adoption and adoptive families. My Exploring Adoption blog is a ministry as well, since I do it in my spare time (but have become rather addicted to it). With the publication of two adoption books, I have moved into the realm of “doing” adoption support on a professional level, as well. But my passion and my calling is to help people; I’ll continue providing adoption support, and if I generate any income from doing so, that’s icing on the cake.
7. How are you using your blog in your work? What has been the biggest surprise?
Blogging about adoption has been the best learning experience of my life! I have met (virtually speaking) fascinating people who have readily shared their stories and their lives with me and my readers. My readers have expanded my narrow perspective on adoption exponentially during the almost three years I’ve been blogging. Because I regularly check my blog’s stats, I’m able to keep tabs on the topics the majority of my readers are interested in. What has most surprised me is the huge numbers of people who are interested in adopting children with Down syndrome. That’s cool!
8. What do you do in your spare time?
You mean, when I’m not blogging? I spend a lot of time at my 14-year-old son’s baseball games (and cross country meets, and basketball games, depending on the season). I love reading books to my 11-year-old son. He loves fantasy books and “dragon” books and he likes to hear me “do” the characters’ voices. I also love to walk, swim, and rollerblade. Right now, I’m in the midst of starting a new internet blogging/marketing/writing business called HeBlogsSheBlogs.com, with my business partner, Jim Rubart. Planning that takes up a big chunk of my free time, but it’s exciting, and we can’t wait to launch our business.
9. What are the last five books you read or movies you watched?
Movies: The Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer; Raising Helen; Bella; Facing the Giants; and Leave It To Beaver, Season 1 DVD (“The Beav” is family-friendly and a complete riot; we all love it).
Books (I read multiple books at one time): The Secret Life of Becky Miller and Renovating Becky Miller, by Sharon Hinck; Tears of a Dragon, by Bryan Davis; Why Didn’t You Warn Me?: How to Deal With Challenging Group Members, by Pat Sikora; Whitehorn Woods, by Maeve Binchy; Bones That Float: A Story of Adopting Cambodia, by Kari Grady Grossman, and Shopoholic and Baby, by Sophie Kinsella. Yes, I have eclectic taste in books!
Labels: adoption, adoption resources, families
Yummy recipe!
Okay, here is the absolute best thing you'll ever make... my friend
Loring just sent this to me!
Alfredo Chicken Lasagna
10 Lasagna noodles
1 jar alfredo sauce (or for the food snob, make your own)
1/4 cup milk
1 1/2 tsp dried oregano leaves
3 cups chopped chicken
1 14 oz can artichoke hearts chopped (costco has huge jars right now for $7)
1/2 cup chopped red bell papper
1/4 cup finely chopped onion
2 cloves of garlic pressed
3 cups (12 oz) mozzarella cheese
4 oz feta crumbled
2 cups packed baby spinach
Combine milk, alfredo, oregano. Whisk together and set aside.
Mix together all chopped ingredients and add garlic, mozz, and feta. Mix well.
Assemble lasagna with sauce on the bottom of pan first.
Cover with foil.
Bake 45 minutes removing foil when time is up and baking another 10-15 min.
I also reserve some red peppers to add as garnish on top for color.
We made this last night but used fettucine instead and made a pasta. So yummy! I was thinking of making this in home made ravioli also. I hope you enjoy this as much as we do.
Great New Book!
These ten tips were adapted from
Authentic Parenting in a Postmodern Culture, available now. Click the link above to buy an autographed copy.
10 Ways to Make Your Home a Haven
For those of you who tuned in to Point of View radio today, welcome! I pray the broadcast was a blessing to you. As promised, here are ten ways you can make your home a haven in this shifting world:
- By letting kindness reign. Determine to treat your children and spouse with the same sweetness you'd give a stranger you're trying to impress. Remember it's God's kindness that leads us to repentance. What makes us think anything different would evoke our children's repentance?
- By welcoming hard questions. It's okay to question. You did it, didn't you? Give your children the same leeway. Let them vent. Let them worry. Welcome their wrestling. Don't give pat answers; instead, let them work through their questions. Love them through a period of questioning.
- By being there. Give your children the rare gift of your focused attention. Look into their eyes. Ask great questions. Relax alongside them. Dr. Ross Campbell says, "In short, focused attention makes a child feel he is the most important person in the world in his parents' eyes."
- By limiting media. Steer your children away from mindless interaction with the TV or video games. Set limits and stick to them. Dare to believe your children are creative, innovative kids who can create instead of idly recreate.
- By playing outside. We've lost the importance of outdoor play. Even if it means walking to the park with your kids, or swimming alongside them, or taking a nature hike, dare to move beyond the four walls of your home to venture out to see God's creation.
- By weeping and rejoicing at the right times. We are to weep with those who weep and rejoice with those who rejoice (Romans 12:15). When a child has a difficult day, scoop her into your arms and cry alongside. When she makes a great grade, jump up and down and celebrate with ice cream.
- By cherishing childhood. Our kids grow up so fast in this crazy culture. Keep them kids as long as you can. Let them play, run, stretch, linger. Limit activities when they're younger so they don't become little stressed-out adults at age ten.
- By reading together. The most haven-producing thing I do as a mommy is simply to read to my kids. I still read to my fourteen year old! Discover books on CD as a family, lessening the tedium of car rides without popping in a DVD. My kids have stayed in the car to listen to a story finish.
- By laughing hard, but not at another's expense. Joking and laughter are blessings you can add to create a fun-loving haven, but be cautious not to laugh at your kids' expense or allow them to laugh at yours or others' expense. Watch funny, clean movies together. Tell jokes. Tell funny family stories over and over until they become ridiculous. A lighthearted family that doesn't take itself too seriously is a haven-home.
- By practicing God's presence in the mundane. Require chores of your kids. It teaches them important life skills. Even so, introduce joy as you work. Turn on the radio, dance, laugh. By learning to practice the presence of God during the chores of life, you create a productive, gratitude-based home.
Labels: mary demuth, parenting, parenting advice, parenting resources
Guest Blogger...Cara Putnam
I really should be writing. Finishing that last sprint to the end of my current manuscript. I only have 3500 words to go, but this blog post has been running through my mind for days, so I’m going to stop and write it.
Deep breath.
Here goes. This is another one of those gut-level honest posts.
I’ve experienced a little grief when one set of grandparents died and when a uncle died. We also lost our dog (and first child in many senses) very unexpectedly a couple months ago. All of those were big losses.
But I’m learning that the death of a child through a miscarriage falls into a whole other plain…and very few people understand. Unless you’ve had one, most people don’t get it (with rare exceptions).
My family doesn’t understand. My friends don’t understand. Even my husband struggles to understand.
To each of them, it is a loss – a real loss – but a one-time loss.
It couldn’t be farther from that for me. Each month I am reminded that I’m not pregnant. Then there are the times that my son or daughter will say something innocent that reminds me again that we’re waiting for a baby. Or that they still think the baby will arrive someday. Or I’ll pick up my son and think I shouldn’t be able to do that because I should be nine months pregnant.
There’s the count-down of what a normal pregnancy looks like. The dates that you anticipated after the baby was born. And the one I dread, almost fear, the due date. That one’s barreling at me, and it’s easy to feel like everyone else has forgotten while I’m curled up in a fetal position wondering how I will survive.
I’m not prone to depression, but there are days that I truly struggle to find the positive in life.
Now don’t get me wrong. Life is still good. God is still good.
But there is also real pain. And if you know someone who has experienced a miscarriage, please remember that the pain doesn’t end – in fact in some ways it builds.
So pray for them. Ask how they are really doing. Because you may be the only one who cares enough to remember and ask.
Here is a great resource for women and families who have experienced a miscarriage.
http://www.miscarriageassociation.org.uk/ma2006/information/leaflets/hiddengrief.pdfLabels: death, empay, hope pregnancy center, loss, miscarriage, prayer, writing
Ever overwhelmed?
Are you ever overwhelmed with thoughts of being a mom?
My main advice is to take one day at a time. You don't need to figure out the next 18 years. You don't even need to think about the next 18 months. Worries can bog you down. Instead focus on what you have going for you today. And make a plan for the most important thing you have to do first. Once that's taken care of, only then do you need to think about the next step.
A few things to remember:
1. You matter. Being a good mom is important, especially for the impact you have on your child. You are significant, not because of what you do, but because of who you are.
2. You are wonderful. When you see yourself as God sees you, you don’t have to worry about an identity crisis. You are his child. You have amazing strengths that are unique to you.
3. You can succeed. When you take time to explore your dreams and dare to grow by trusting God to help you, you become more of the person he designed you to be. You also become a gift to those around you, including your child.
4. You are loved. Intimacy means connecting with someone who touches your heart—through communication, time spent together, and love shared. True intimacy is found when you connect with those who appreciate you for YOU.
5. You are smart. We receive instruction from school, through special training, and from life. Focus on being instructed by those who want you to succeed and are willing to help you.
6. You can’t do it alone. Every mom needs a support system--friends, parents, teachers, and mentors. Also, if we ask for his help, God never makes us struggle alone. His help may be bringing another person into our life. It may be giving us the courage to deal with our bad habits or to get out of a destructive relationship. His help may be providing the strength to go to attend school, to work, and take care of a baby. Jesus is available 24/7. Just ask.
7. You need to recharge. We can’t work 100% of the time. Everyone needs to enjoy life and rest. When God created the world, he worked for six days, then rested on the seventh. He didn’t need to take that long. He didn’t need a day off. He did it as an example for us. God created within us the need to balance our work with rest. This includes a physical breather—actually setting aside a day for recreation. We don’t need to feel guilty for the way we were made. Taking time for recreation is just as important as taking time to meet our other needs!
8. You can’t do it all. Perspective means focusing on what will last—especially our family and relationships. They are the things we will never regret giving our time, energy, and love to. Focus on those.
9. You matter. Everyone needs to feel that what they do is important. If you ever doubt if you are important ... just look into the face of your child. No one can take your place!
Labels: children, family, marriage, mothers, parenting, personal time, relationships
Generation NeXt Marriage book cover
Coming in January 2008!
What do you think?
Labels: books on marriage
Hey Mom...
...have you ever thought about going back to school? Enrolling in a correspondence course? Starting a new hobby? Try this:
1. Ask for help. You may need help with things like babysitting and homework. (Yes, homework!) Make a list of those who can help with your various needs … and don't feel too proud to accept their help.
2. Seek alternatives. Some schools have alternatives programs, such as free childcare, community classes, or correspondence courses. Talk with advisers to see what alternatives are available to you.
3. Don't give up! Schooling is hard, but the time you put into it will improve your future. Also, don’t feel you have to finish by next year. If it takes you four years to complete a one-year program … you’re still done! Remember that you will reap rewards in the future for sacrifices you pay today.
4. Finally, remember that YOU are your child's example. Be the person who can show your child to follow big dreams!
Labels: continuing education, dreams and goals, going back to school, mothers
Guest Blogger...Cara Putnam
We’re headed to the Sun
My kids are precocious. I’m not the only one who says that. Most people who spend anytime with them will use that word or a similar one to describe them.
They are best friends. I love that. I know a time will come when they aren’t so willing to play with each other, but at 6 and 3 they really do enjoy each other. Most of the time. Though I did have to laugh a couple weeks ago when they each created a “secret” room in their closets. Well, our daughter created hers first; then she helped our son make his. His has been pretty dormant since the first day. Hers is in constant use. And I have to admit it’s pretty cute when they curl up in their to sleep. Both of them. In one closet. A walk in closet, but still a closet.
They also have imaginations that don’t stop. I love that. And try to cultivate it. Though there are days I’m certain I could hand them a paper bag and they’d create a show or play around it.
Tonight I went outside for 15 minutes to move the water, pull some weeds and other fun, but necessary yard chores. When I went back in, they were decked out in an assortment of carefully thought out gear. See photo.
The hats were just because astronauts wear hats. The jackets and second layer of clothes were to protect their skin from the sun and outer space. The backpacks contained 4 pounds of oxygen that could last as long as they need. Both had boots on to for walking in untested worlds.
Then they had an assortment of items to help them navigate. It was a riot to watch them make their presentation.
I love to watch them create, because God is a creative God. And He created us in His image. I firmly believe that when we are creating whether it’s a piece of art, a play, a book, a meal – anything really – at that time we are mirroring God.
And I love the feeling that comes when I meet God in the creating. There is nothing like having an on-going conversation with Him about how to develop a character or write a chapter or wrap up a book.
As summer speeds by, how do your kids use their imaginations? Are they transported to other worlds? To the bottom of the sea? I can’t wait to hear your stories.
Labels: children's activities, god, siblings, summer vacation
Greetings from Atlanta!
I'm here for ICRS (International Christian Retail Show).
The last few days have been about all things bookish--fiction workshops, marketing, business planning, editing and more.
I’ve also had a chance to talk with a lot of writer-friends and get free copies of their new books, yeah! It’s great to be around a group of people that can talk deadlines, sales, marketing, etc.
I haven’t been outside yet much. So, currently “Atlanta” means the inside of the Hyatt and the Marriott. (Okay, I did cross the street to get from one hotel to the other.)
Over the weekend was the Christy Awards, and all I can say is AMAZING. The friends were wonderful. The keynote by Lauren Winner was FANTASTIC. And everything else from the prayers, introductions, and awards presentation really was well-done.
And the winners of the Christy Awards ...
Contemporary Stand Alone: Winter Birds by Jamie Langston Turner!
Contemporary Series, Sequels, and Novellas: The Brethren by Beverly Lewis!
Historical: Madman by Tracy Groot!
Lits: Sisterchickes in Gondolas by Robin Jones Gunn!
Romance: The Measure of a Lady: by Deeanne Gist!
Suspense: Plague Maker by Tim Downs!
First Novel: Where Mercy Flows by Karen Harter!
Young Adult: William Henry Is A Fine Name by Cathy Gohlke!
Congrats to all the winners!
Tricia Goyer here.
You know what I've been thinking about? I've been thinking about YOU.
1.
You matter. You are significant, not because of what you do, but because of who you are.
2.
You are wonderful. When you see yourself as God sees you, you don’t have to worry about an identity crisis. You are his child. You have amazing strengths that are unique to you.
3.
You can succeed. When you take time to explore your dreams and dare to grow by trusting God to help you, you become more of the person he designed you to be. You also become a gift to those around you!
4.
You are loved. Intimacy means connecting with someone who touches your heart—through communication, time spent together, and love shared. True intimacy is found when you connect with those who appreciate you for YOU. They are concerned about you and honor you in every way.
5.
You are smart. We receive instruction from school, through special training, and from life. Focus on being instructed by those who want you to succeed and are willing to help you.
6.
You can’t do it alone. Everyone needs a support system--friends, parents, teachers, and mentors. Also, if we ask for his help, God never makes us struggle alone. His help may be bringing another person into our life. It may be giving us the courage to deal with our bad habits or to get out of a destructive relationship. His help may be providing the strength to go to attend school, to work, and take care of yourself. Jesus is available 24/7. Just ask.
7.
You need to recharge. We can’t work 100% of the time. Everyone needs to enjoy life and rest. When God created the world, he worked for six days, then rested on the seventh. He didn’t need to take that long. He didn’t need a day off. He did it as an example for us. God created within us the need to balance our work with rest. This includes a physical breather—actually setting aside time for recreation. We don’t need to feel guilty for the way we were made. Taking time to have fun is just as important as taking time to meet our other needs!
8.
You can’t do it all. Perspective means focusing on what will last—especially our family, other relationships, and God. They are the things we will never regret giving our time, energy, and love to. Focus on those.
9.
You matter. Everyone needs to feel that what they do is important. If you ever doubt if you are important ... just look into the face of your child. No one can take your place!
Goyer-esque
I read a new review today from one of my regular readers (see below). Her word "Goyer-esque" made me smile. It also made me wonder ... what is Goyer-esque? Would people know if they just started page one that it is a novel written by me?
Personally, I have a REALLY hard time describing my writing: historical, some romance, lots of war, historically accurate, intrigue, suspenseful, multiple-POVs that come together at the end ... but how do I describe that simply? Or can I?
In fact, I've been having problems with new proposals lately. Mostly because I know what I do, but I don't know how to describe myself. (I'm also having trouble with proposals because current deadlines have kept me from jumping in fully ... full research, character development, etc.)
So can you help? If you read one of my novels before ... how would you describe my writing?
Thanks!
Review by Judy Fedele:
The first novel in a new series about the Spanish Civil War, A Valley of Betrayal unfolds with a distinctively Goyer-esque feel to it. In this book, author Tricia Goyer does another brilliant job bringing history to life with vivid characters searching for their meaning in the midst of conflict, each wanting to contribute their utmost for their cause.
In this time and place in history, it's the middle of the Spanish Civil War. The Nazi's are exerting their influence from one side, strong-arming Fascism over the country. At the same time, Russia is enticing the area with the idealistic vision of Communism. Spain is divided between the two political perspectives, and the resulting battleground ravages the country in the process.
The most serious fighting isn't found on the front lines, though, but in the internal struggle of every individual who must decide who they are and what they truly believe in. Some of the characters are natives of Spain; others from different countries who are drawn to the area for their own reasons. Some come to fight, and some to serve, but they all discover themselves in the process. Each naturally feels that their side has the most righteous cause, and all are willing to risk everything in the effort to win the war.
Goyer tries to communicate the struggle of a people searching for themselves amidst the rubble of their ideals. It's not an easy struggle, nor an easy story to read considering the cost of the war. But despite the fact that no one seems to emerge on top in this bloody battle, the novel itself is a winner. I highly recommend A Valley of Betrayal by author Tricia Goyer, and eagerly look forward to the next installment in the series.
Guest Blogger...Cara Putnam
Butterfly Days
Yesterday contained one of those had to be there moments. Of course, as a writer, I’ll try to describe it.
We’d just gotten home from a friend’s house, and the kids were outside while I put on casual clothes. Confession – I got distracted by email – and next thing I know my daughter is standing in front of me with a huge grin on her face, hands clasped tightly in front of her.
“Mommy, guess what I caught!”
Over the last couple summers we have planted perennials designed to attract butterflies. Occasionally, we’ll see a brightly colored Monarch, but usually the butterflies are pure white with maybe a bit of green running along the vein lines.
I gulped and tried to match her excitement. “A butterfly?”
“Yes. Look!” And she opened her hands. The dazed butterfly stood on her palm for a moment and then took off. In the office. Heading straight for the window. “Catch it, Mom!”
I am not a trained butterfly catcher. I can’t even remember catching them as a child. I love to watch them and provide food for them, but catch one?
I eyed the window. The office’s window is framed by wooden blinds that don’t retract anymore. The butterfly is trapped against the window, and I’m trying to figure out how to reach it without giving it a stroke or crushing it.
First, I pull up the window, trying to think of a way to pop the screen and send the butterfly to freedom that way. Abigail panicked and accused me of crushing it. The butterfly hyperventilated – at least that’s what I think all the frantic beating of its wings represented.
Second, we lowered the window and tried to coax the butterfly to fly past the blinds. It never considered leaving the light.
Finally, I sent Abigail downstairs for a large cup, and I plopped it over the top of the butterfly. Then we slipped a piece of paper between the window sill and the cup to form a lid. In moments I had it outside and shook it out of the cup and into one of the flowerbeds.
Abigail skipped away to chase more butterflies, and I considered what I’d just seen. How often does God encourage us to come toward Him and freedom, and we beat our heads against a plate of glass that appears to lead to safety. Instead, its counterfeit. The butterfly would have died quickly if left to beat against the window. God woes us in many ways back to Him, but in the end always grants us the freedom to choose. Will we love Him or will we go our own way.
As for me and my house, we choose to love and serve Him.
Cara C. Putman
Canteen Dreams -- October 2007; Sandhill Dreams -- May 2008 and Captive
Dreams -- September 2008 (Heartsong Presents)
Deadly Exposure -- June 2008 (LI Suspense)
The Law, Life & Books: http://carasmusings.blogspot.com
Original Writer for Jake Tremaine at Scenes & Beans:
http://kannerlake.blogspot.com
Fathers...
"My Dad's Best Advice"
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Fathers hold a special place in all of our hearts. Whether your Dad played a big part in your life or not, he probably gave you some pieces of advice you'll never forget. But even if your Dad wasn't around during your growing up years, you can learn from the fathers of these popular authors. |
This is a great read: http://www.titletrakk.com/dad_advice_authors.html
