Generation NeXt Parenting

Friday Flashback...On Monday!

posted by Tricia Goyer @ 7:16 AM 1 comments

Friday Flashback...

posted by Tricia Goyer @ 7:01 AM 1 comments

Yearly check-ups!

Summer has officially arrived. If you're like me, then you've scheduled your children's yearly doctor and dentist appointments. I found these tips by ONDD to be very helpful!

38 Tips to Keep Your Kids Entertained and Stress Free When Seeing a Doctor

The idea of going to the doctor or hospital can be a very scary thing for young children, and even scarier for parents who can envision the screaming, kicking and temper tantrums that might ensue. Rather than hide behind an outdated magazine and pretend the child belongs to someone else, doing a few simple things before, during, and after your child’s visit can help make sure that the stress-level stays low and that your child gets the care that they need. Below is a list of tips and resources for making your trip to the doctor a piece of cake.
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Do Your Research
Some of the most important things you can do to keep your child’s visit to the doctor stress free happen before you ever set foot in the office.

1. Choose the right doctor
It is extremely important to pick a doctor who both you and your child are comfortable with. You should take your time to research doctors in your area, ask friends and families for referrals, and tour offices. Click here for a few more tips on how to pick the right pediatrician.

Keeping your child entertained at the doctor’s office does not have to be a difficult task.

2. Be consistent
Once you find a physician that you are comfortable with and your child likes, it’s a good idea to stick with this person. It will help your child to know what to expect and feel more comfortable with trips to the doctor. (If there’s a particular nurse in your doctor’s office who your child reacts well to, it’s a good idea to request this nurse in advance of future appointments).

3. Pick the right ER
You can do a little research now to make an emergency situation go more smoothly, should you ever find yourself in that position. Check out the hospitals in your area and find out if any of their emergency rooms have child specific units.
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Communicate
Helping your child to understand what happens during visits to the doctor is one of the most effective things you can do to help minimize their fear and anxiety about what will happen.

4. Explain what’s happening
It’s important to use words that your child will understand when you’re explaining what happens at the doctor’s office. Using age-appropriate language, you should explain what your child can expect to see, hear, and even smell when they visit the doctor.

5. Roleplay
Using this technique is one of the best things you can do to help your child understand what will happen during their appointment. Your child can practice being the patient while you play the doctor, or you can reverse roles. You can also consider using a stuffed animal as a potential patient to show your child what the doctor might do to them during the appointment.

6. Read a book about going to the hospital
There are several books written just for children that help explain what a visit to the doctor or hospital is like. Click here for some suggestions.

7. Make it sound normal
In addition to the medical procedures that happen at a doctor’s office or hospital, there are also many “normal” things that go on as well - like watching TV, talking, playing with toys. By emphasizing these aspects of the doctor’s office with your child, you can help them see their visit as a more normal occurrence.

8. Be honest
It’s important that you honestly communicate with your child about why they are going to the doctor and what will happen while they are there. While it’s important to be sensitive and not scare them with too much information, your child will be less anxious before and during the appointment if they are prepared for what might happen.

9. Be specific
Children often don’t understand medical terminology, so it’s important to explain in detail what’s happening. For example, if the doctor has to “take some blood,” it’s important that your child knows that this is just a small amount to help them get better.

10. Give them some warning
Children should be told in advance of any pending visit to the doctor. This will allow them time to express any fears or anxiety that they might have and prepare in advance for the visit. With younger children, a day’s warning is probably good enough, so as not to give them too much time to worry about what will happen.
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Be Prepared
We all know what it’s like to sit in the waiting room, anxiously awaiting our name to be called so we can see the doctor. This nervous anticipation is even worse for young patients, so it’s important that you’re prepared to help make the waiting game as short as possible.

11. Bring your insurance information
It’s necessary to bring your insurance and prescription card to your appointment. This will help expedite the process and also help your physician’s office determine what your co-pay is and if you need to be preauthorized by your insurance company for any procedures.

12. Be on time
It’s very important to be on time for your child’s appointment, because if you arrive past your scheduled time, it might be hard for your doctor to fit you in. If you know that you have to fill out paper work or insurance information for your child before their visit, it’s a good idea to arrive 15-20 minutes early.

13. Make a list
You might want to write down any questions or concerns you have about your child’s health before you get to their appointment. This will help you remember what you want to say should your child’s anxiety or emotions distract you during their visit and prevent you from having to make another appointment for things that you forgot.
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Make It As Fun As Possible
Bringing a few extra things along with you for your child’s visit to the doctor’s office or hospital can help make sure you have distractions on hand, should you need them, and keep your child entertained throughout the process.

14. Pack a snack
We all know that hungry kids are cranky kids, so it’s good to have some kid-friendly snacks on hand should your appointment take longer than expected. Click here for some snack ideas.

15. Bring a book
If your child has a favorite book, it’s a good idea to bring it along. It will help you kill time in the waiting room and serve as a comforting reminder of home for your child.

16. Know some games
If haven’t done so already, it’s a good idea to brush up on some kids games that you can play with your child to help the time go by. You can use this gamefinder to find something appropriate.

17. Let your child choose a “comfort” item
Does your child have a favorite stuffed animal or blanket? Let them bring it along to help them feel more secure and safe during the visit.

18. Bring some “just in case” items
If you find yourself in the position where you have to bring your child to the emergency room, it’s a good idea to bring a few extra things with you to make the process go smoothly. A toothbrush, a change of clothes and your cell phone charger are always good ideas to have on hand in case you have to stay overnight.

19. Pack a doll
More than just a comfort item, a doll can also serve as a great guinea pig during your child’s appointment. The doctor or nurse can demonstrate on the doll what they’re going to be doing to your child to help them understand.

20. Involve your child in the process
If you’re going to be spending more than one night at the hospital, it’s a good idea to let your child help you pack their suitcase and pick what you’ll be bringing with you. That way, you won’t forget anything that they might want and they’ll feel like they have more control over the process.
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Get It Over With
One of the best things you can do to help reduce your child’s anxiety about visiting the doctor is to get it over with as quickly as possible. The tips below will help you do just that.

21. Make it go quickly
By using the entertainment tips above and being as prepared as possible, you can make the appointment go more quickly - or at least feel that way.

22. Learn how to present your child’s case
Quite often, parents find themselves as nervous and as flustered as their children when they see the doctor. It can be helpful to familiarize yourself with your child’s condition or symptoms before you go in, so you know how to help your physician understand what’s going on. Click here. to learn how to most effectively present your child’s case to your doctor.

23. Ask the right questions
If your child’s doctor says something that you don’t understand or you find yourself wanting more information, make sure you ask questions. This will help prevent an unnecessary trip back to the doctor’s office.

24. Know the medical historyKnowing your child’s medical history will help their doctor more quickly make a diagnosis and prescribe the appropriate treatments. To find out what’s included in a medical history,click here.
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General Tips
Below are a few general tips to help this process go as smoothly as possible, and to keep both you and your child calm and relaxed.

25. Get them accustomed to the process
If possible, it’s a good idea to bring your child along to another appointment before they go to their own. Whether it’s a sibling’s trip to the doctor or your own, taking them along will help them see what it’s all about.

26. Take a practice trip
If you have the time, you can go through a “dress rehearsal” appointment with your child if they are particularly anxious. Drive to the location, take a tour of the waiting room, and even meet some of the staff if at all possible.

27. If possible, schedule a check-up first
Your child is much more likely to handle higher stress medical situations better if they’ve been through the process already. So before you find yourself in an emergency situation, schedule a general wellness check-up for your child.

28. Stay with your child as much as you can
Fears of abandonment are often one of the largest triggers of a child’s anxiety at the doctor. By reassuring your child that you’ll be with them most of the time and sticking around through the appointment (and especially overnight, if need be), you can help alleviate some of this anxiety.

29. They can express emotion, you can’t
While it’s important that you allow your child to express what they are feeling about their visit to the doctor - fears, worries, etc. - it’s just as important that you maintain a positive attitude throughout the process. Children often respond to the stress levels of their parents, so by staying calm and collected, you will help them do the same. If you find yourself getting emotional, just briefly excuse yourself until you have regained your composure.

30. Be patient
You should try to be especially patient with your childhood during their visit to the doctor. It’s possible that they may act out due to their anxiety, and it’s important that you help them process these emotions instead of punishing them for them.

31. Get a babysitter
If you have other children, it’s a good idea to leave them with a babysitter or family member. This will allow you to devote your full attention to the child who is visiting the doctor.

32. Encourage visitors
If you find yourself in a situation where your child has to spend extensive time at the hospital, you should encourage people familiar to your child to visit (in accordance with hospital policy). Having friends and family visit will decrease feelings of isolation and provide comforting stability.
33. Pick a good time to go
If you have the luxury of scheduling a wellness exam for your child’s first visit, you should try to do it in either the spring or summer, when doctor’s offices are less busy. This will allow the doctors and nurses to spend more time with you and your child and allow for a less hectic atmosphere.

34. Don’t use the doctor as a threat
It’s very important that you help your child to see his or her doctor as a friend and ally. You shouldn’t say things like, “If you’re bad, the doctor will give you a shot,” as this will only increase feelings of fear and anxiety.

35. Use relaxation techniques to help your child stay calm
If your child is nervous during the doctor’s appointment, you can try calming techniques, such as slow breathing or blowing bubbles, to help lower your child’s stress and calm their nerves.

36. Debrief the visit with your child
Following the visit, you should spend some time discussing it with your child to find out how they felt about what happened. This will help you address things that can be modified for the next visit and find out what worked (or didn’t) from your preparations.

37. Reward good behavior
While it’s probably not advisable to make a trip to the toy store after every appointment, you can still reward your child for their bravery. If they make it through a difficult procedure or appointment, follow it up with something that they like, whether it be a trip to the park or a play-date with friends. This will help them to associate the doctor with things that are positive.

38. Trust your instincts and your child
If at any point during your child’s visit to the doctor, you or child is seriously uncomfortable with the manner or care of your physician, then find a new doctor. An uncommunicative or unsympathetic doctor will only increase your child’s anxiety and make it that much harder to treat their condition. You have options.
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A little planning and forethought on your part can go a long way toward decreasing the anxiety of your child and making sure that they are calm, cool, collected and entertained during their visit to the doctor. By following these tips, you’ll keep their visit stress free. Which is just what the doctor ordered.


Stop Lurking! Every week I will draw names for a free Tricia Goyer book from those who comment on my blogs. Winner's choice! Tell your friends.

posted by Tricia Goyer @ 7:21 AM 2 comments

Guest Blogger...Cara Putman

Names.

Shakespeare said a rose by any other name would smell as sweet.

Not sure I agree. Names have meaning -- and we speak that over a person every time we call their name.

Fortunately, God's in to changing names. Jacob (deceiver) became Israel (God contended). Saul becomes Paul. Simon becomes Peter.

I've taken names very seriously when naming our children. Just ask Eric.
There would be names we liked that couldn't be seriously considered either because of the meaning or the lack of a Bible story to back up the name.

I want my children's names to be a prophecy in a sense. A statement of their destinies every time it crosses someone's lips.

Abigail Joy. Abigail means father's fountain of joy. I joke she's my joy joy. She delights everybody who knows her. And my deepest desire is that she will have the depth of character, wisdom and beauty of Abigail from the Bible.

Jonathan David. Jonathan means God has given. David means beloved. Our son who is a beloved gift straight from God's hand. He is a joy -- highly loved by those who know him. And I long for him to be a man with the combined strengths of the Old Testament friends Jonathan and David. And the strengths of his Grandpas: David and Walter John.

Rebecca Paige. Rebecca means joined together; Paige means assistant or servant. I've been adamant that our next daughter would be Rebecca Paige though I couldn't really tell you why. And the more I prayed about this baby, the more I knew that was the right name if she turned out to be a girl. This morning as I was holding her and praying, God showed me it was the perfect name for her. She is called to be His servant. To follow Him all the days of her life. And that is exactly what I want for her and my other children.

So what about you? What's your name mean or why did you choose the name you did for your children?


Cara C. Putman
Canteen Dreams -- available now; Sandhill Dreams -- May 2008 and Captive Dreams -- September 2008 (Heartsong Presents) Deadly Exposure (LI Suspense) 4 Stars from Romantic Times http://www.caraputman.com/ Craftie Ladies of Suspense http://ladiesofsuspense.blogspot.com/


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posted by Tricia Goyer @ 11:36 AM 0 comments

Friday Flahsback...on Monday!

Which one is the doll? Both!

posted by Tricia Goyer @ 7:58 AM 1 comments

Friday Flashback...

Gee, do you think I'm a ham or what? It's still my favorite pose :-)

posted by Tricia Goyer @ 7:57 AM 3 comments

Father Involvement- Super Soaker

posted by Tricia Goyer @ 9:42 AM 0 comments

Father Involvement- Cheerleader

posted by Tricia Goyer @ 9:41 AM 2 comments

So cool!

My inbox overfloweth with all the comments about my segment on Moody Midday Connection concerning Generation NeXt Marriage. If you missed it, you can listen to the podcast here:
http://www.moodyradio.org/brd_programarchive.aspx?id=11156

And if you loved it ... (or even liked it a little) I'd really appreciate it if you sent feedback at: midday@moody.edu

They love hearing comments about shows, and I love knowing you enjoyed the show!

Now I'm off to the dentist ... can you see the forced smile :-)

Stop Lurking! Every week I will draw names for a free Tricia Goyer book from those who comment on my blogs. Winner's choice! Tell your friends.

posted by Tricia Goyer @ 8:51 AM 0 comments

Guest Blogger...Cara Putman

This morning I slipped on a beautiful bracelet a friend gave me at least year's ACFW conference.

I was sitting here at the computer, holding little Rebecca as I "try" to work and saw the words on the bracelet again. Hallelujah and Amen. What bookends to the last 18 months.

Amen to God's goodness even when I don't understand things like the miscarriage. Amen to trusting that He knows what He's doing. Amen that He can turn painful things into good -- in ways only He can.

And Hallelujahs as I hold this little miracle that after five weeks I simply can't imagine our family without. Hallelujah for the fact that even if I had been the only person He still would have sent His Son to die for me and Jesus still would have chosen to come. Hallelujah for all the ways I see His fingerprints on my life.

So today I'm thankful -- for the good and the bad.

Cara C. Putman
Canteen Dreams -- available now; Sandhill Dreams -- May 2008 and Captive Dreams -- September 2008 (Heartsong Presents) Deadly Exposure (LI Suspense) 4 Stars from Romantic Times http://www.caraputman.com/ Craftie Ladies of Suspense http://ladiesofsuspense.blogspot.com/


Stop Lurking! Every week I will draw names for a free Tricia Goyer book from those who comment on my blogs. Winner's choice! Tell your friends.

posted by Tricia Goyer @ 8:56 AM 1 comments

My 20 Wishes...

Greetings from SUNNY Montana, which is nice. Very nice, since there was snow last week.

I just got back from a week away in Florida with my husband. John went to a Microsoft Conference and I wrote in the hotel room ... and, of course, occasionally hung out at the pool. You should see the PILES of stuff waiting on my desk!

I'm currently juggling three late summer/fall book deadlines, AND I'm leading a team of 19 adults and teens to the Czech Republic July 27th-August 11th. Add one high school graduation, one huge 16th birthday bash, one child's knee surgery, a media tour, and lots of FUNDRAISING and I've discovered a new favorite drink ... CranENERGY. :-)

Anyway, back to the 20 Wishes ...

Here are mine:

1. That we would get the $15,000 we still need for our missions' trip. We've raised over $30,000 so far!!! (It's expensive to take 19 people to Europe for 19 days.)
2. That we will make heart-friends with the Czech people.
3. That we will welcome knew brothers and sisters into God's kingdom during the trip.
4. That we will be a blessing to the Czech church, and we will be blessed.
5. For blessings on our adoption from China. And that I'll be patient during the long wait.
6. For our future daughter, whoever she is.
7. That my son Cory's knees will heal fast and that it will be clear it's God's doing.
8. That Cory will grow in his faith during his summer internship.
9. That John and I will step into the roles of friend/mentors and that Cory will step up to the plate and make wise decisions for everything concerning his future.
10. That Leslie and Nathan will also grow in their faith.
11. For Andrea our soon-to-be foreign exchange student. That she will have safe travel here in August and fit into our family well.
12. For my husband's children's church curriculum to find a way to reach churches and communities.
13. For God to do something big in me and in the message and words of my book Blue Like Play-doh.
14. For God's hand on the two novels I'm working on.
15. For better sales for my current books-in-print ... so their message will touch hearts.
16. For better sales for my current books-in-print ... so I can continue to write more.
17. For national media opportunities to share the good news of Jesus.
18. For peace and trust in God in all circumstances.
19. For discipline, will-power, and self-control in taking care of myself--God's temple.
20. That I may surrender to God for all!

Okay, looking back, I suppose these "wishes" are great prayer request, too. I covet your prayers!


Stop Lurking! Every week I will draw names for a free Tricia Goyer book from those who comment on my blogs. Winner's choice! Tell your friends.

posted by Tricia Goyer @ 9:38 AM 1 comments

Interview

Hi there!

I just wanted to remind you that I'll be on Moody's Mid-Day Connection Today!

If you don't get it on your local radio station tune in here:
http://www.moodyradio.org/middayconnection.aspx

You can listen LIVE at 12:00 p.m. CST. (Or 11:00 a.m. Montana!!)

Stop Lurking! Every week I will draw names for a free Tricia Goyer book from those who comment on my blogs. Winner's choice! Tell your friends.

posted by Tricia Goyer @ 9:35 AM 0 comments

Friday Flashback...

posted by Tricia Goyer @ 7:55 AM 1 comments

Steph asked...What is a GenXer?

Sorry! A Gen Xer is born been 1961-1981. (Some use 1964-1979). We had some part of our high school years touch the 80s.

Boomers are 1945-1960 (ish).

GIs are their parents.

Gen Yers are 1981-2000. They are also call Millennials.



More facts about Gen Xers:

Divorce skyrocketed during our growing-up years. We grew up in families with stepmoms and half-siblings and living every other weekend with a different parent.

The divorce rate doubled between 1965-1977 and 40% of Gen Xers spent time in a single-family home before age 16.

Gen Xers long to be accepted. We want applause and gold stars. This comes from the loneliness and alienation of our splintered families growing up.

Gen Xers once bore labels such as ‘slacker’ and ‘grungy,’ but many of us have gone G-rated. We believe in family values. Many are very conservative.

Once Gen Xers got serious bout life, family means the most to us. We’re caregivers. (Often caring for children and parents/grandparents.)

Only 28% of Gen Xers attend church.



Also:

1. We embrace interracial marriages and international adoptions.

2. We experiment with alternative lifestyles, such as living together. (Which I personally think is a big problem with our generation.)

3. We want a strong nuclear family.

4. We don’t sell out to careers if it means sacrificing at home.

5. We’re willing to work at what matters. Our generation reads marriage books and attends conferences. We look for answers.

6. We're into "family" but that doesn't mean our biological family. We create our own family units with those we care for most. (This is me. We've adopted older singles, teen families, college students, etc. and they celebrate on holidays and such with us more often than our real families. In fact, we call them our family members!)

Okay, Steph, you asked :-)


Stop Lurking! Every week I will draw names for a free Tricia Goyer book from those who comment on my blogs. Winner's choice! Tell your friends.

posted by Tricia Goyer @ 10:08 AM 1 comments

Your 20 wishes!

A friend passed this along to me...and of course, I'm sharing it with you!

Debbie Macomber has a great interview up on CNN right now that I thought everyone here might enjoy!

Way to go, Debbie!

I love the premise of her new book, where a character writes a list of her twenty greatest wishes. And I love the Set Your Wish Free web site Debbie has set up. Reading some of the wishes that have already been posted was a deeply moving experience.

If you were to write a list of your top twenty wishes, what would they be?

So I ask you...what your 20 wishes?

I'll post mine soon!


Stop Lurking! Every week I will draw names for a free Tricia Goyer book from those who comment on my blogs. Winner's choice! Tell your friends.

posted by Tricia Goyer @ 9:26 AM 2 comments

Sparkpeople

Need to lose weight? Want encouragement? Need recipes for healthy foods? Need someone to help you track your goals?



My sisters and I joined Sparkpeople last week and we LOVE it. So far I lost three pounds. If you want to know more watch this short video. (Honestly, they are not paying me to say this ... I really love it!)



This short clip tells you more about the site:

http://www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/foxnews.asp



Also, be sure to check out my page! And, if you join, ask me to be a friend ... we can encourage each other.



www.my.sparkpeople.com/TRICIAGOYER


Stop Lurking! Every week I will draw names for a free Tricia Goyer book from those who comment on my blogs. Winner's choice! Tell your friends.

posted by Tricia Goyer @ 7:56 AM 0 comments

Who I Am Makes A Difference www.makeadifference.com/BR/

posted by Tricia Goyer @ 8:08 AM 3 comments

Friday Flashback...

posted by Tricia Goyer @ 7:53 AM 1 comments

Summer fun for boys!

This has to be one of the most unique promotions of all time:

To encourage summer reading, Max Elliot Anderson, author of action-adventures and mysteries for kids, released a bottle with a special card inside into the Rock River, near his home of Rockford, Illinois, on May 31, 2008.

"Since most of my books contain adventures, and are written especially for boys 8 - 12, I wanted to do something different this summer, to point out the importance of reading in America," he says. "That’s because I grew up hating to read." His blog, Books for Boys, ranks in the top 10 searches on Google.

He placed the bottle into the river, downstream from a spillway. "I know there are lots of hazards and obstacles in the rivers," says Max. "But I’m hoping my bottle makes its way to the end of the Rock River, and into the Mississippi. If it gets that far, then who knows?"

When the card is returned to the author, he will send a set of his books to the person who found it. "What better way to get kids excited about the adventure of reading, than to give them a real adventure this summer?" Max reasons.

Max's books, which have been compared to such literary figures as Tom Sawyer, Huck Finn, Nancy Drew and Lemony Snicket, include North Woods Poachers, Mountain Cabin Mystery, Big Rig Rustlers, Secret of Abbott’s Cave, and Legend of the White Wolf.

http://www.maxbooks.9k.com/
http://booksandboys.blogspot.com/

Stop Lurking! Every week I will draw names for a free Tricia Goyer book from those who comment on my blogs. Winner's choice! Tell your friends.

posted by Tricia Goyer @ 9:41 AM 2 comments

Check it out!

If you like Tricia Goyer...we recommend...go here to see!

Can you think of any other match ups???

Tell me who you think should go with how and I'll enter you in a drawing for a free book!


Stop Lurking! Every week I will draw names for a free Tricia Goyer book from those who comment on my blogs. Winner's choice! Tell your friends.

posted by Tricia Goyer @ 10:33 AM 3 comments

Guest Blogger...Cara Putman

Back during the 90s there was a lot of discussion about the fact that it takes a village to raise a child. While I don't agree with the conclusion the proponents of that statement pushed, I've been reminded all over again how valuable and important it is to live in community.

Why?

Rebecca's birth. She is 3 1/2 weeks old now, and we have been blessed abundantly by friends and family. There were the many friends who helped as I waited for Rebecca to arrive. Since she couldn't decide what her due date should be, but liked to tease me with contractions, there were several times friends stepped in to watch the kids as we rushed to the hospital. And one friend in particular tried to keep me distracted as we waited for the real labor.

Then Eric's mom and my mom both stayed with us in those early days. They have the tag team action down perfectly. And Eric's sister Rhonda came up after my mom left to help a couple nights.

Then there are the wonderful friends and neighbors who brought us meals. I don't "like" to cook on the best of days. When I'm exhausted with a newborn, it's the last thing on my mind. Thanks to the generosity and help of friends, I'm only now thinking about that universal dilemma -- what's for dinner?

Since Rebecca's a summer baby, and we didn't know she was going to be a Rebecca, we had no clothes for her. Friends have given her the most beautiful clothes. And then two special friends loaned me boxes of clothes.
She went from a little girl with a couple outfits to the best dressed baby girl in town.

This is what the body of Christ looks like when it's operating as Christ intended. I haven't had to ask for help. People offer and then it's up to me to accept it. Our family is blessed immensely, and I can't wait to see the blessing returned on those who have celebrated with us.

posted by Tricia Goyer @ 11:02 AM 2 comments

My new baby niece!

Megan...





Stop Lurking! Every week I will draw names for a free Tricia Goyer book from those who comment on my blogs. Winner's choice! Tell your friends.

posted by Tricia Goyer @ 10:54 AM 3 comments